Compatibility for Myers Briggs Types Part 2

I’m back with other compatibility theories for the Myers Briggs types, as promised. Remember each of them brings a new and potentially confusing viewpoints so take them with a grain of salt. It’s up to you to eventually decide which makes more sense and is more accurate.

For more on MB compatibility, also read:
Compatibility for Myers Briggs Types Part 1
Incompatibility of Myers Briggs Types

Tandem processes compatibility

The tandem processes are the opposite cognitive functions that work together within a type to create psychological dynamic and balance.

There are four pairs of tandem functions: Ne ↔ Si, Se ↔ Ni, Te ↔ Fi, Fe ↔ Ti. According to Keirsey, types who share tandem processes are more likely to get along well and find common grounds for understanding each other.

Here are the groups of such types:

Se ↔ Ni: xNTJ, xNFJ, xSTP and xSFP

Fe ↔ Ti: xNTP, xSTP, xNFJ and xSFJ

Ne ↔ Si: xSTJ, xSFJ, xNFP and xNTP

Te ↔ Fi: xNFP, xSFP, xNTJ and xSTJ

For the compatibility model, Keirsey decided that not only the main tandem process must be shared, but also the S/N preference (which in many views is the key to a fruitful relationship). So here are the compatible types:

ENTP most compatible with: INTP, ENTP, INFJ, ENFJ

ENTJ most compatible with: ENTJ, INTJ, ENFP, INFP

ENFP most compatible with: ENFP, INFP, ENTJ, INTJ

ENFJ most compatible with: ENFJ, INFJ, ENTP, INTP

ESTP most compatible with: ESTP, ISTP, ESFJ, ISFJ

ESTJ most compatible with: ESTJ, ISTJ, ESFP, ISFP

ESFP most compatible with: ESFP, ISFP, ESTJ, ISTJ

ESFJ most compatible with: ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTP, ISTP

INTP most compatible with: INTP, ENTP, INFJ, ENFJ

INTJ most compatible with: INTJ, ENTJ, INFP, ENFP

INFP most compatible with: INFP, ENFP, INTJ, ENTJ

INFJ most compatible with: INFJ, ENFJ, INTP, ENTP

ISTP most compatible with: ISTP, ESTP, ISFJ, ESFJ

ISTJ most compatible with: ISTJ, ESTJ, ISFP, ESFP

ISFP most compatible with: ISFP, ESFP, ISTJ, ESTJ

ISFJ most compatible with: ISFJ, ESFJ, ISTP, ESTP


Duniho’s compatibility model is based on the same principles as the above, the only difference being that he suggested the E/I preference must also be the same.


MassMatch compatibility

Is based on 2 books ( “Looking at Type: The Fundamentals” by Charles Martin and “Just Your Type” by Paul D. Tieger) and can also be found on massmatch.com.

I’ve always been quite fond of this particular model, it seems to bring a lot of common sense and coherence to this whole compatibility nebula. Here it goes:

ISTJ most compatible with: ESTJ, ISTJ, INTJ, ISTP, ESTP
/ least compatible with: ESFJ, ESFP, ENFP, INFP

ISTP most compatible with: ESTJ, ISTJ, ENTJ, ESTP
/ least compatible with: ISTP, ESFP, ENTP, INTP, ENFJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP

ESTP most compatible with: ISTJ, ESTP, ISTP, ESFP
/ least compatible with: ESFJ, INTJ, ENFJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP

ESTJ most compatible with: ISTJ, ESFJ, ISFJ, ENTJ, INTJ, ISTP
/ least compatible with: ESTJ, ENFJ, INFJ, INFP, ENFP

ISFJ most compatible with: ISFJ, ENFJ, ESTJ
/ least compatible with: ENTJ, INTJ, ENTP, INTP, ENFP

ISFP most compatible with: ESFP, ISFP
/ least compatible with: ENTJ, INTJ, ENTP, INTP

ESFP most compatible with: ESTP, ISFP
/ least compatible with: ISTJ, ISTP, ENTJ, INTJ, INTP

ESFJ most compatible with: ESTJ, ENFP
/ least compatible with: ESTP, ENTJ, INTJ, ENTP, INTP, INFJ, ISTJ

INFJ most compatible with: ENTP, ENFP, INFJ, INFP, ENFJ
/ least compatible with: ESTJ, ESFJ, ESTP, ISTP

INFP most compatible with: ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ
/ least compatible with: ESTJ, ISTJ, ESTP, ISTP, ENTJ, INTJ

ENFP most compatible with: INFJ, INFP, ENFJ, ENFP, ESFJ
/ least compatible with: ISTJ, ESTJ, ISTP, ESTP, ISFJ

ENFJ most compatible with: ISFJ, ENFJ, ENTJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP
/ least compatible with: ESTJ, ESTP, ISTP, INTJ

INTJ most compatible with: ESTJ, INTJ, ISTP, ENTJ
/ least compatible with: ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTP, ESFP, ISFP, ENTP, INFP, ENFJ

INTP most compatible with: ENTP, INTP, INTJ
/ least compatible with: ESFJ, ISFJ, ISTP, ESFP, ISFP

ENTP most compatible with: ENTP, INTP, INFJ
/ least compatible with: ESFJ, ISFJ, ISTP, ISFP, INTJ

ENTJ most compatible with: ESTJ, ISTP, ENTJ, ENFJ, INTJ
/ least compatible with: ESFJ, ISFJ, ESFP, ISFP, INFP


LoveTypes compatibility

This model is based on Alexander Avila’s book, “Love Types” and is said to be the result of extensive research and study. It’s focused mainly on romantic compatibility and it also has a whole website dedicated to it – lovetypes.com.

What I found intriguing about this theory is that it splits type compatibility according to gender. There are consistently different matches for women than for men, even though they belong to the same type. And although I personally don’t believe in gender differences - at least not when it comes to personality – I think this model is definitely worth a look:
ENTPwomen: most compatible with ENTJ
men: most compatible with INTP, ESTP
ENTJwomen: most compatible with ENTJ, ESTJ
men: most compatible with ENTJ, ESTJ, INTP, ENTP
ENFPwomen: most compatible with ENFJ, ENFP
men: most compatible with ENFP, INFP
ENFJwomen: most compatible with ENFJ, ISTP
men: most compatible with ENFJ, ENFP, ISTP, INFP
ESTPwomen: most compatible with ESTP, ENTP
men: most compatible with ESFP, ISFP, ISTP, INFJ
ESTJwomen: most compatible with ESTJ, ENTJ
men: most compatible with ISTJ, ESFJ, ESTJ, ENTJ, INTJ
ESFPwomen: most compatible with ESFP, ESTP
men: most compatible with ESFP, ISFP
ESFJwomen: most compatible with ESFJ, ESTJ
men: most compatible with ESFJ, ISFJ
INTPwomen: most compatible with INTJ, ENTJ, ENTP
men: most compatible with INFJ
INTJwomen: most compatible with INTJ, ESTJ
men: most compatible with INTJ, INTP
INFPwomen: most compatible with INFP, ENFP, INFJ, ENFJ
men: most compatible with INFJ
INFJwomen: most compatible with INFJ, INFP, INTP, ESTP
men: most compatible with ENFJ, ENFP, ISTP, INFP
ISTPwomen: most compatible with ISTP, ESTP, ENFJ
men: most compatible with ISTP, ISFP, ENFJ
ISTJwomen: most compatible with ISFJ, ESTJ
men: most compatible with ISFJ, ISTJ
ISFPwomen: most compatible with ISFP, ISTP, ESFP, ESTP
men: most compatible with ISFP
ISFJwomen: most compatible with ISFJ, ISTJ, ESFJ
men: most compatible with ISFJ, ISTJ



For more detailed info on Myers Briggs compatibility, here are some good books you can try:


Just Your Type: Create the Relationship You've Always Wanted Using the Secrets of Personality Type





Lovetypes: Discover Your Romantic Style And Find Your Soul Mate





16 Ways to Love Your Lover






Wired for Conflict: The Role of Personality in Resolving Differences





Marriage Types






The Intimacy Factor: How Your Personality and Your Past Affect Your Ability to Love and be Loved






Intimacy and Type: A Practical Guide for Improving Relationships for Couples and Counselors



Comments

Anonymous said…
This is amazing, thanks! keep it up please!
May 13, 2009 at 10:17 PM
Anonymous said…
Hmmm, what do you all think about an INFP and an ESFP????

Email me if you feel like passing on any advice!

Thanks!
Kate

Juniperequinox@yahoo.ca


Also, thanks for the great blog.
August 24, 2009 at 10:57 PM
Anonymous said…
I would also like to know whether an INFP can be compatible with ESFP... i perosnaly think they could complement each other...the ESFP could be a good source of energy,protection and joy for the more closed INFP.

If you any experience or thought e-mail me at mhindicky@yahoo.com
September 5, 2009 at 12:52 PM
Anonymous said…
I've just lost a "friend" who is an ESTP. I am an ESFJ. We always argued but had some good times too. We work together and became friends. I found he lied a lot however and eventually became resentful of me and mocked my values and life. It was too much for me and I said I thought he was not a genuine friend as a genuine friend would not behave that way. We have barely spoken for 8-9 weeks. We are both males in our 30's. Any comments here.
September 13, 2009 at 1:20 PM
Anonymous said…
so, just wondering, do the 'male' and 'female' categories assume heterosexuality? what if a person is homosexual or bisexual?
September 14, 2009 at 6:16 PM
The Tenth Muse said…
This is a great article. I'm really fascinated by Myers Briggs.

My question starts here...I've been typing out as ISFJ for many, many years. Twice in the last six months, I've typed as INFJ. I see a lot of me in both descriptions.

Is it common to switch like this?
Also, I'm married to an ISTJ man. What happens with compatibility?

Thanks!
October 29, 2009 at 1:48 AM
INTP said…
I don't think type can actually 'change' over time. I assume that your S/N preference has always been a bit unclear, most probably because of an environment incompatible with your natural inclination. However, typing as ISFJ for such a long time indicates that this is most likely your basic type.

Perhaps it would be best to ask yourself if in these past 6 months your life has gone through certain changes or you've been under more stress than usual. Then it would probably mean that your basic type is still ISFJ but you're resorting to your Ni function to deal with your problems.

Ni (in INFJ) and Si (in ISFJ) are similar in a way, because they both reside in the left brain and are used for experiencing and adjusting new information into our inner worlds. Thus they are interchangeable to an extent and stressful periods can cause such a (reversible) change.

When we feel stuck in our lives, we tend to try and solve our problems using our crow-nest functions - in ISFJ's case, they are the Ni and Te. This is why under a lot of pressure from the outer world, an ISFJ might appear INFJ or (more rarely) ISTJ at times.

For more on the crow-nest functions and the way we use our less developed cognitive processes, I definitely recommend Lenore Thomson's book, "Personality Type: An Owner's Manual"
October 29, 2009 at 1:49 AM
Anonymous said…
Keirsey says you should go for someone with everything opposite except S/N. This has worked well for me, as an INTP with an ENFJ.
January 20, 2010 at 8:50 PM
Perseus said…
It is all very well saying two people will compatible with each other, but there is the rest of the world. INTP & ENFP are highly compatible (opposite genders) but the Guards SJ resent the pairing and there are lots of Guards around. ISTJ will be attracted to ENFP as opposites and they go around in packs.
August 4, 2011 at 7:23 AM
Anonymous said…
Most compatible type for
enfp-istp
entp-isfp
estp-infp
enfj-istj
entj-isfj
esfj-intj
esfp-intp
estj-infj.


Why? They help balance each other out. These relationships last longer than others, because they stay interesting long after the initial stages of romance have worn off. Don't believe me? Do some research into these matches. See what you find. :)
March 12, 2012 at 8:43 AM
Anonymous said…
Any infj females paired with Istj males out there?
June 28, 2012 at 8:16 PM
Anonymous said…
I do not agree with the INFP/INTJ match. INFPs do not get along with INTJs. The first always need to be reassured, they need people to care for them while INTJs are independant and do not express their feelings enough to come to INFP's expectations. INFP are idealistic, while INTJs are to down-to-earth so much so that they drive INFPs miserable and less confident. INFPs are likely to get along with ENFJs for instance.
October 2, 2012 at 6:45 AM
Anonymous said…
I've been studying Myers Briggs for 6 years, and its not realistic to say that certain types are "comfortable" with other types. I think its an interesting concept, but it holds no real value and is like having a parent tell you who you are friends with and who you are not.
December 7, 2012 at 2:55 PM
Anonymous said…
I can see why it would be good fto have a J and a P in a relationship so one person can make decisions and the other can go along with it. Wouldn't it be nice though, if 2 P's both developed their decision mAking skills and leadership skills instead of being overridden all the time. 2 J's would have to see eye to eye or else there could be problems I suppose.
December 17, 2013 at 11:51 PM
female INTP said…
I don't know how INTPs could be compatible with INTPs/ENTPs. I've dated both (I am a female INTP) and these relationships drive me mad. There is no balance with an INTP-INTP relationship, and I just can't handle ENTPs. Seems like the worst of both worlds. I've had very successful working relationships with INTJs and ENTJs - I really appreciate having somebody with a long-term vision around in a professional context, especially when they are also open to intellectual debate and happy to let you achieve outlined objectives in your own way. I am not so open to being told what to do in a personal context...but I am still old-fashioned and prefer the man to make the decisions (or at least the suggestions).
October 9, 2015 at 6:43 AM
Anonymous said…
You could have given a ENFJ a try though.(I am a male INTP)
May 5, 2017 at 2:54 AM
Anonymous said…
As an INTP, I mostly agree with Duniho. Although people often talk about introverts needing extroverts to "draw them out," the reality is that many introverts don't want to be "drawn out." We like our time for quiet contemplation and need someone else who understands that, not someone who's constantly nagging us to be more social. I've been in relationships with extroverts, and that's exactly what it was--a lot of nagging and disappointment on their part that I wasn't more interested in going out. The sensor/intuitive preference is also very important in a match, especially for the intuitive. That's because a lot of sensors don't feel a lack of connection with intuitives, but many intuitives feel the lack of connection with sensors.

As for tandem functions, I can understand how that would help with compatibility, but then why does Keirsey not include NFPs on the match list for NTPs? Both share Ne-Si.

Anyway, I don't think hard and fast rules for determining compatibility work very well. I think much depends on the individual's level of development and personal needs. For example, I'm an INTP who is highly introverted, has a strong desire for mental connection, and wants a partner who is sensitive and empathetic because a romantic relationship is the one context in which I feel comfortable expressing emotion, and I would like to be with someone who continues to make feel comfortable in that area. Therefore, I find myself most attracted to INFJs and INFPs. I don't do well with extroverts, sensors, or thinkers who don't have a well-developed feeling side. However, let's take an INTP who isn't as introverted, works in a demanding position that requires all their mental energy, and really hates "romantic nonsense." This person might do well with an extrovert because they don't mind going out regularly, or with a sensor because they already get their intellectual needs met at work, or with a fellow thinker because they don't want to have to get all mushy-gushy in a relationship. It all boils down to individual differences and the varying relationship needs that accompany them.
November 30, 2017 at 9:18 PM
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